There are so many changes in my life
I don’t know if it’s wrong or if it’s right
And I want you, want you by my side
Everything is gonna be alrightChanges in my life
I won’t leave you behind
Changes in my life
You will see in timeIn life we’re always looking
Leave the past behind
We try to see the warnings and read all the signs
Sometimes you gotta take chances
Nothing stays the same
The world will keep on turning
Again and again, again and againChanges in my life
You’re always on my mind
Changes in my life
I got you by my side
As I type this, I’m still questioning how much I feel comfortable sharing on this blog, but then I think, how should I expect you guys to read this and listen to me if I’m not being real with you?
Last Friday, I got let go from my job. After a year at my first real job in the real world, I found myself unemployed due to “the economy.” All I could focus on were these thoughts about the new car I just bought, the medical bills and student loans I have to pay, my upcoming trip to New York, but most importantly, everyone I was going to disappoint.
The first thing I did was call my former boss and asked for my old delivery job back. It’s not much, but it’s something, and it offered some sense of stability. I needed to know there was somewhere for me to go come Monday to not completely lose it.
Then I began telling people, which was the hardest part. Fortunately, everyone has been so supportive and understanding, and I’m starting to see that it’s not so bad and could be worse. That’s what’s given me the courage to open up here.
The good news? My former coworkers gave me some good leads on future employment, and I have some interviews lined up. The bad news? They’re in Orlando.
Maybe this is the push I needed to change my situation and get out of Gainesville. Focusing on the good is the only thing getting me through my days, but it’s not enough to get rid of this overwhelming stress. In the last week, my life has turned upside down, and this is only the start of everything changing. And I’m not great at dealing with change.
I feel like I’m standing in the middle of a tornado, unable to control the world spinning around me. It’s making me physically sick, I’ve lost my appetite, and my mind is constantly buzzing with “what-ifs.”
It’s tough, but I know I’ll be ok.
I have some interviews, I have a part-time job, I have some freelance gigs, and I have all the time in the world to work out now. Things could be worse. So I’m going to keep thinking that something positive will come out of this and take it one day at a time.
I really hope you guys can forgive me if I don’t post as much as you’re used to, but I don’t like to write when I have nothing to say. Please keep reading and please keep checking back, because this blog is one of the most positive things I have right now, and I don’t want that to change.
